October 2011 Tidbits

"Mom, it'll be a short night?"  Tess asks me this every night before bed.

Tess likes to point out a very specific spot on the nape of Drew's neck as his "cutest spot."  "I like to give him kisses there cuz he's so cute."

Tess loves being helpful these days.  She loves to pick out her own clothes now and she has her own rules for matching clothes (flower prints and flower prints match; solids and solids match; jeans "go with everything").  She can get herself completely dressed in the morning and put her dirty clothes in the laundry basket on the washer, after which she announces, "I'm ready for the day!"  She enjoys setting the table for dinner and making sure everyone has proper utensils for the meal.  When she's done, she likes to carry her dish over to the sink.  She's also turned into kind of a cleanup freak.  "Mom, I think today is a cleanup day."  She likes to organize and will announce to me that she's going to "clean up" her bed, which involves lining up all her stuffed animals into a long, neat row.  She loves using the spray cleanser and wiping things down, particularly windows.  Speaking of wiping, she also likes to help with Drew's diaper.  I was changing him and she said, "I'll get the wipes.  I can do it because I'm really good at the penis." 

This evening a political campaigner stopped by to hand out some brochures and Tess wanted to know what they were doing. I explained that it had to do with voting, like when we pick a President or some other elected official. Tess replied: "I have a great idea! Maybe daddy would be a good President!"

A few nights go I (Ryan) was helping Tess change into her pajamas. Out of the blue, she said to me, "I look like a caveman." I replied, "Tessie, what does a a caveman look like?" Tess: "He has long hair, he wears a red shirt with sleeves, and he has no pants." (I don't know where she picked up that bit of knowledge.)

We had roast chicken for dinner, and I let Tess have the drumstick. She accurately assessed: "This is the chicken's leg!" Then she continued her anatomy lesson: "Here's the chicken's foot and right here is its toenail!" It was a bit unnerving when Tess stood her chicken leg up on its "foot" and started walking it around her plate.

I got (forced) Tess to the gym today with the assurance that I would stay with her in the playroom and not leave her to exercise. Not exactly the point of going to the gym, but we're taking baby steps. They've redone the kids room since we were last there (yes, it's been that long) and she loved it. She agreed to let me exercise for 15 mins and didn't want to leave when I came back. But then again tonight she's back to her old automatic thoughts: "I no want to go to the gym tomorrow, Mom! I will miss you, etc. etc. etc."

Two Tess comments during an evening walk tonight with Ryan:

She spotted some string lights hung on someone's deck and said, "It's not Christmas time! Let's put those away and get out Halloween stuff!"

Once they reached her favorite forested area, it was starting to get dark. Tess suggested, "I think the animals turned out the light."

Tess successfully went to all of Primary by herself today. Not of her own choosing and not without some tears, but she did it.

I read Tess a book tonight about a pigeon that does not want to go to sleep. At one point, the pigeon tries to stall bedtime by noting that a television show is on. The pigeon declares, "It should be highly educational." I asked Tess, "What does educational mean?" Tess: "It means kinda boring."

At Tess' request, we went for a walk today. She was frustrated because we weren't walking where she wanted to go and she ended up in meltdown mode. I finally had her climb on the stroller and she said, "Mom, I think after this is nap time."

"Mom, that dinner last night was very delicious!"

Tess rushed in to greet Drew when he woke up this morning and yelled to me the following report: "Yuck, Mom! Drew is really stinky. He smells real bad! [cough, cough] Ugh, he smells like animal poop! Hurry, Mom! My room smells like a PANDA!"

New Tess tantrum phrase: "I throw Mom in the crashcan."

Tess: "Drew cries after he blesses." Dad: "What does 'blesses' mean?" Tess: "It means 'achoo.'"

Tonight at dinner, Tess looked at Drew and said, "Dad, why is Drew's face red?" I told her I didn't know. She replied, "If he drink some water, his face'll be the same color as our face--pink."

I let Tess play with my iPod on the way home from the grocery store and I could hear her making sounds of utter frustration. When I asked what was wrong she replied, "Ugh. I trying to get on Facebook."

Tess has started asking to talk to Dad on the phone at work everyday. It's really funny to listen to her conversation and listen to the lilt and cadence of her "phone voice." A funny snippet from her conversation today: "Dad, you know if you talking on the phone and you get tired, you can just put the phone on the hard counter and lie down and keep talking. Or stand up, if you want to. Yeah, you can do that. You can."

Mom, I miss Dipsy. I need a really, big, big, big, big, big, HUGE picture of her. Not a little one cuz I can't see her.

Mom and I have spent some time couch shopping during this trip. Tess does great in furniture stores and loves to test out all the couches. When we came across one we really liked, Tess all of a sudden went into meltdown mode. "I no want a new couch! I like my red couch! It's my favorite! The red couch with the holes is my favorite!" Crying, she ran and hid under a coffee table until she calmed down. She finally came to terms with the idea of a new couch: "Mom, we can take pictures of the red couch? We get the new couch and we can sit on it and look at pictures of the old couch, OK?"

The other day I was grocery shopping in the baby food section. We had one of those "car" grocery carts, and Tess was in the car with Drew in the basket seat. I was talking with Tess and she was chattering away while I picked out our baby food selections. Then this woman came over to me with her mouth wide open in an apparent state of shock. "Oh my goodness!" she said. "Oh wow! I totally did not see your little girl down in the car! I thought it was your baby talking like that. All I could think is that my baby is SO FAR BEHIND!" I laughed so hard to think of Drew making conversation with me in the grocery store. I still laugh when I think of the look on that woman's face!

Dad: "Tess, what did you think about General Conference?"

Tess: "It was kind of boring."

Tess, describing her reaction to a song played during General Conference, "Dad, it was so funny I spitted Capri Sun out of my mouth."